I am ludicrously happy that you are coming with us on this trip. You are the reason I am trying to make it happen and make it fun and make it interesting and a beautiful experience, because I want you to have brilliant experiences. That's what I want to think about now, before I go on this trip, so that I don't bring along a lot of tenseness and worrying about what you're thinking as I plan and try to keep things together to some degree. Am I being too natural and cool? It's because I'm making a very strong effort to be that way. Sometimes I'm busy and need to keep my cool even though I do very much want to dote on you.
Nothing is forgotten and there is a powerful history which moves forward even now. We will both change strongly in some way on this trip, and I think I need to try to pretend everything is completely normal until we are well and truly on the road in order to keep my shit together and not forget to bring any water. Nothing ever ends, even if it changes so strongly you don't know what it was before. Dead and gone is a phrase I'd like to save for when the first one of us attends another's funeral. I will tell you whatever the key few words are to this cryptic monologue when we are together to undergo a transformative experience. Understand that the skies in my mind are still thickly clouded with a complete lack of knowledge about what the future really holds.What I'm saying is that the drama of our interactions could be so much more productive if we lay on our backs looking at the entirety of the Milky Way and trick ourselves into feeling that we're sucked onto the side of the planet instead of communicated in these days before by text message.